Missing motivation

Has anyone seen my motivation? I misplaced it somewhere between last year and mid current semester. It isn't real big but it is really important. It may or may not be connected to some ambition. The last time I saw it, it was perched precariously atop some perspective. Come to think of it, I may have lost that as well. There are many perspectives but they get camouflaged in varying experiences. There have been so many things on my mind of late that I forgot to keep track of these things. And now my mind is buried beneath a bunch of distractions. I tried to move some of those but I couldn't find my mind either. It must be lost too. As long as you're helping me find my mind if you find some patience along the way I'd like to borrow some. You see, I've never had much patience of my own and it seems to make learning so much better. I would sure like a little patience. There is so much I need to be doing right now, the list seems to get longer every day and I feel that if I could just get things prioritized I might find success in getting these things accomplished. I just need to pair desire with some motivation. Has anyone seen my motivation?

The semester is winding down and the projects due are mounting up. Somewhere in the melee of everything I have been involved with I lost a bit of sleep. It got lost when I found a little bird. The bird has been worth the loss of sleep and brings a lot of joy to those who spend time with it. This morning in my meetings a thought was shared regarding how in a volunteer organization such as the church we are faced with our inadequacies and the weight of our short-comings. The Lord has never used perfect men to move his work along in His church. He merely asks who will feed His sheep. Our response determines our ability to grow. Will we answer, "Here am I"? Those three words pack a wonderful sermon. They speak of faith, willingness, desire, and love.
Later in church as one of the speakers was addressing the congregation I was brought to think of this desire and reflected that desire is where faith begins and thus also our testimonies. Being perfect (Matt. 5:48) requires a desire to give up all evil, even our "favorite sins." In order to achieve perfection we need to acquire and maintain a relationship with our Father in Heaven. This requires frequent communication via prayer. True prayer requires self-honesty. In the Adventures of Huckleberry Finn, Huck Finn noted "you can't pray a lie."
Another speaker addressed love, and as he spoke I thought about love and service. True love can be found in service where there is no expectation of any recognition or reward. So I thought, "who/what do I love?" Where is my service spent?
One last thought from today's meetings. The story of Alma the younger was shared and I reflected on the words the angel spoke to him. "If thou wilt." The rebellious youth still had his agency and was being told effectively, "Choose ye this day whom ye will serve." I have witnessed individuals choose different masters and can testify that the devil never supports his own. The Good Shepherd knows his sheep and they know His voice and salvation is the reward for obedience. As we draw unto the Lord the mysteries of the universe shall be unfolded, but only line upon line. There are so many for whom this process is painstakingly slow and they lose focus deciding to reap the more immediate rewards bestowed in mortality by men.
I spoke to an individual today who has returned from years of inactivity. He stated for years he was a self-professed atheist despite having the influence of the church all around him. He stated that while not all of his questions have been answered he doesn't want to go back to where he was when he was mired in unbelief. He stated he doesn't agree with everything in the church but is content to go along until his answers are received. He stated he understood the church has its faults as it is led by imperfect people but is happy to learn line upon line. He is a much happier person now than before when he questioned God's existence. I have found that those who choose to believe in some version of a deity and practice that belief, not just profess a belief, are happier than those in life who abstain from such a lifestyle.

Just some updates on the family.

William enjoying birthday ice-cream

William has chosen to eat at Red Robin for his birthday for the past three years. He told the waitress something along the lines of, "I didn't know if you knew but tomorrow is my birthday and since I won't be here I thought you should know." Basically, "my dinner is short dessert and my parents are too cheap to cough up the monetary compensation for the overpriced dessert and I would really like dessert and some embarrassing song routine at my table sung at a room clearing decibel." He got his ice-cream and song though the other patrons indulged the song and stuck out dinner.